


22 Pairs

by JohnAmendAll



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Double Drabble, Drabble, F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-06
Updated: 2010-12-06
Packaged: 2017-11-15 07:23:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 2,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/524674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JohnAmendAll/pseuds/JohnAmendAll
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A set of drabbles: All the Doctors and companions, paired off at random.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Always On My Mind

**Author's Note:**

> Recipe: Take a list of Doctors and companions, shuffle it, and write drabbles for the resulting pairings (a couple of mine came out as double-drabbles). If you want a list of your own, [this page](http://www.seasip.info/Misc/shuffle.html) will generate pairings, and [this one](http://www.seasip.info/Misc/shuffle3.html) will generate threesomes.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We commence with Eight / Jo.

Jo was already in bed when the man who called himself the Doctor stuck his head round the door.

"Just turning in," he said cheerfully. "See you tomorrow." 

"I wish you hadn't shown up again," Jo said, her fingers nervously fidgeting with the edge of her duvet. 

"You'd have been in a lot of trouble if I hadn't." 

"Yes, but... when I married Cliff, I thought of him as a younger you. It made things between us, well, complicated. And now _you're_ a younger you. Every time I look at you, it just makes me feel so–" She blushed. "Guilty." 


	2. Down With The Ship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Turlough / Nine.

The starship shuddered as explosions tore through important parts of its main engine. 

"Go on, then," one of the two remaining people on the bridge said. "Tell me how bad things are." 

"Vislor–" the other began. 

"First name terms, so we're going to die. Which would you rather, last rites or a farewell shag?"

"If you'd shut up for a second," the Doctor said, "I was going to say if you left at once you could make it to the escape capsules." 

Turlough shook his head. "I seem to have developed a sense of loyalty to you. It's very inconvenient." 


	3. Whatever It Is You British People Do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dodo / Adam.

_That's the third time he's told me that hacking story_ , Dodo thought. _Only last time it was NASA._

An inspiration struck her. "Adam, let's dance." 

His confidence, she was pleased to note, dropped back a notch. 

"Are you sure?" he asked. "Only, you know, it's been a long day and..." 

"You can't dance, can you?" 

This time there was an agonised silence before he answered "No."

"You should just have said that in the first place." Dodo laughed suddenly. "Come on, let's dance anyway." 

"But I'll–" 

"Look like a complete pillock?" Dodo patted his cheek. "That's the idea, smart boy." 


	4. Second Thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two / Ace.

Ace hadn't been able to believe her luck. The bloke was a bit older than she was used to, yes, but somehow everything she admired. And he was even interested in making explosives!

They'd parted on good terms, and she'd been walking away, a spring in her step, when she'd heard the TARDIS engines and realised.

And now she was in the bathroom, wrenching at the taps, tearing off her clothes, scrubbing frantically at her body in desperation to remove every trace of the thing she'd done.

But she already knew there wasn't enough soap in the world for that.


	5. A Nightmare To Others

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five / Harry.

"I will withdraw," the chubby, bespectacled man said. "For now." 

With a crackle and a flicker, he was gone.

"About time too," the Doctor said. "Now, I'll just destroy the TARDIS, and we'll wake up properly." 

"Excuse me," Harry said. "Didn't he just say–" 

"They're both dreams. That's the trick." 

"Oh. Well, do you have to do that straight away? I mean, if this is a dream, we can do whatever we like and then wake up." 

"That's not a bad idea." The Doctor thought briefly. "How does naked hide and seek grab you? Sorry, could have phrased that better." 


	6. Save The Thanks This Prince Expects

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vicki / Steven.

"You little idiot!" Steven shouted, dragging Vicki out of the way. The sluglike monster that had been bearing down on her thundered past, not even slackening its pace. "What were you thinking?" 

"I thought I could distract it," Vicki said sulkily. "Didn't they teach you anything like that in Spacefleet? You know, strategy and tactics and stuff?" 

"Enough to know when not to try a stunt like that!"

Vicki pouted. "Why should you care, anyway?" 

"Because you're important to me." Steven blushed. "I couldn't bear it if–" 

"Really?" Vicki brightened up at once. "Well, why didn't you say so before?" 


	7. Ground Rules

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack / Amy.

"Just so we're clear," Amy said, "I only do kissing. That's all. No kinky stuff. And no tongues." 

Her client looked her up and down. 

"You sure that nun's costume isn't for real?" he said.

Amy put her hands on her hips. "And what's that supposed to mean?" 

"Thought I knew this century pretty well by now. A girl your age who won't do anything but kiss, that's pretty rare." He broke off as Amy dissolved into laughter. "Ah. You mean the kissing's all you do _for money_. The other stuff–" 

"I'm... open to suggestions." 

Jack clicked his fingers. "Gotcha." 


	8. This Time Round: Collateral Damage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mel / Peri.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> François the Ogron bartender is from the [This Time Round](http://ttrarchive.com) setting.
> 
> * * *

Peri glowered at the Ogron.

"That's the most prejudiced, reactionary attitude I've heard in years," she said. "What's it got to do with your boss if Mel and I want to do a bit of horizontal calisthenics from time to time?" 

"Ladies having sexytimes with other ladies not problem for Proprietor," the Ogron said. "Not problem for François, either."

"Then what's he complaining about?" Mel asked. 

"Every time getting busy, you both screaming, yes?" 

"So?" 

"Costing Proprietor big dollar in breakages," François said solemnly. "Windows. Glassware. False teeth. So keep noise down in future. Or have kept down for you." 


	9. The Initiation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoë / Leela (Double-drabble).

Despite her obvious exhaustion, Zoë tried to keep dancing, but it was too much for her. She collapsed onto the dirt floor of the hut. 

"Was..." She ran out of breath, and started again. "Was that enough?" 

"Your initiation is complete," Leela decided. 

"And that's what they made you do, when you became a Sevateem warrior?" 

Leela snorted. "Of course not. Why would we do such a stupid thing? I invented this ritual last night." 

"Why?" Zoë asked, staring up at her in astonishment. 

"You think I am a credulous savage. You expect savages to do such things, so you believed me when I told you we did this. And now, who is credulous?" She looked down at Zoë lying naked in the dirt, her body painted with elaborate designs. "And who is the savage?" 

"You did all this just to prove a point?" 

"And..." Leela hesitated. "And because I longed to see you like this. You fascinate me, Tesh girl." 

Zoë suddenly rolled onto her back, and grinned. 

"I'm starting a tribe," she said. "I can do that, if I'm a savage. Would you like to join? Take your clothes off and we can start initiating you straight away." 


	10. Needs Must

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One / Ben.

"I'm afraid this will be rather awkward," the Doctor said. He looked perfectly at home in his purple-edged toga; by contrast, Ben though his own tunic made him look like a twerp. "You shall have to pose as my romantic partner." 

"You mean a rent boy," Ben said bitterly. "We'll have to share a bed and all, won't we?" 

"I know how you must feel about this, my boy, but that Senator knows where Polly is being held, and I see no other way to gain his confidence." 

Ben nodded. "One thing. If you can't be good, be gentle, OK?" 


	11. Distracted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adric / Barbara.

"Although the immediate cause of the Peasants' Revolt was the Poll Tax of 1380, the restrictions placed upon serfs were definitely a contributing factor..." 

Try as he might, Adric couldn't follow the thread. While he was paying rapt attention, it certainly wasn't to the substance of the lesson. Miss Wright affected him in a way that none of his teachers on Alzarius ever had. He'd never imagined any of them removing their tunic, but he couldn't stop picturing Miss Wright pulling that sensible cardigan over her head... 

"Adric?" 

He jumped. 

"Wake up, boy!" 

He felt himself blushing furiously. "Sorry, Miss." 


	12. Take Me For What I'm Worth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Romana I / Susan.

"The Doctor did tell me about you," Romana said. "But were in a queue for a Searchers concert at the time, so I was inevitably a little preoccupied." 

Susan's eyes widened. "You're a Searchers fan?" 

"I'm not sure about 'fan,'" Romana said offhandedly. "The Doctor took me to a couple of their concerts, and Spencer James gave me his autograph..." 

"Marry me." 

Romana looked her up and down, then pulled out a handheld computer and consulted it for some time. 

"Why not?" she said. "I'm only up to three spouses so far. Do you like your engagements short or long?" 


	13. It's Important Not To Rush These Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Four / Romana II.

"If you would only move, I might be able to reach my sonic screwdriver," Romana said.

"Move?" The Doctor's expression suggested he'd never encountered the concept before. "Why should I move? I like it here." 

"Because we're handcuffed together, and–"

"Yes, very nice. Cosy. Why don't you put your head on my shoulder and have a nap, and then you can give our situation another think." 

Romana bowed to the inevitable, and leaned on the Doctor as he'd suggested. 

"You're doing this deliberately, aren't you?" she said. 

"Really?" He was grinning; she knew even without looking. "Wouldn't that be terrible?" 


	14. Cards on the Table

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three / Eleven.

The Eleventh Doctor laid down his cards in triumph. "Full house."

"Sorry, old chap." The Third Doctor displayed his own hand. "Four aces." 

"If you weren't me I'd suspect you of cheating," the Eleventh said. He removed his shirt, then carefully replaced his bowtie. "My turn to deal." 

"Cheating has nothing to do with it. You'd do far better to face up to the facts." 

The Eleventh Doctor suddenly leaned forward. "Ha! Caught red-handed! Is that a sonic screwdriver in your pocket or– sorry, trick of the light." 

"That's right," the Third replied calmly. "I'm just pleased to see you." 


	15. Like An Old Married Couple

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donna / Seven.

"Husband and wife?" Donna asked. 

"There's a rrreduced rrrate for couples." 

"You'd make a terrible husband. You never tell me what you're doing, and you don't look after the children–" 

He looked alarmed. "What children?" 

"The ones we'd have, if we were married." 

"Could we possibly concentrate on buying these tickets, and leave–" 

"Listen to this, sunshine: Over. My. Dead. Body. Last time I followed one of your plans I ended up standing on a fountain dressed as a bloody mermaid! For hours!" 

She stormed out, slamming the door. 

"You did," he said to empty air. "Exactly as planned, too." 


	16. Conversation in a Brisbane Café

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ten / Tegan.

"I... I tried travelling without a companion for a while," the Doctor said. He blinked away a manly tear. "But things went wrong." 

"Come on," Tegan said. "Out with it."

"On Mars. History said Commander Brooke and her crew died. I thought I could change things. I was wrong." 

"You mean they died anyway?"

"Well, I was able to save two of them–" 

"And you call that _wrong_?" Tegan grabbed him by the arm, and frogmarched him out of the café.

"Ow! What are you–" 

"I'm coming with you. You're quite right. You haven't got a clue on your own." 


	17. By Way Of Demonstration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nyssa / Sarah Jane.

"It's very good of you to see me," Sarah said, opening her notebook. "Now, Ms Traherne–" 

"Nyssa, please." 

"You're an expert on the Archangel technology, I understand."

"Correct." 

"And you're decommissioning the network, because of health concerns. What kind of concerns?" 

"Well," Nyssa said. "It's designed to combine the latent psychic energies of a planetary population, under the control of one person– call them the Keeper. Like this." 

And suddenly, Sarah was kneeling before Nyssa, her head swimming. 

"Wouldn't you consider that dangerous?" Nyssa asked. 

Sarah was inclined to agree. But she actually said: "Kinky. Do that to me again."


	18. Vindicta Nemo magis gaudet quam foemina

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jamie / Polly.

"Polly?" Jamie looked up as she stormed into his room. No doubt that the lass was in a high temper. "What's the matter?" 

"Ben's the matter, of course. Fooling around with that silly little barmaid!" 

"The one with the blue hair?" To tell the truth, Jamie felt a certain sympathy with Polly. He'd had his eye on the girl himself, before Ben had swooped in and secured her. "Polly, what are ye doing?" 

"There's a saying: 'Don't get mad, get even,'" Polly said. 

"Are you thinking– Lass, you'll regret this tomorrow." 

Polly's dress slid to the floor. "Tomorrow's another day." 


	19. Caught in the Act

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ian / Rory.

In Rory's experience, you couldn't get away with anything. At school, no matter how many of the class had been misbehaving, he'd always be the one left to face the music when the teacher came in. But this time, he decided, the Universe must have made a special effort. He'd been sure Amy was halfway across the Galaxy and millennia in the future. Had it somehow opened a time rift for the express purpose of dumping her here at the most embarrassing moment possible? 

If so, it couldn't be faulted on its timing. 

"Rory," Amy said, with icy calm, "you're in bed with another man." 

"Uh, yeah. Er, this is Ian. Ian, this is Amy. My wife." 

"Pleased to meet you," Ian said. He sounded rather less flustered than Rory felt, perhaps because he knew he didn't have to explain himself to a flame-haired goddess of vengeance. 

"Right." Amy waved a hand. "Get on with it." 

Rory opened and closed his mouth a few times, and managed to come up with "What?" 

"Your all-boy sexy... thing." She seated herself in a chair, with the air of a theatre critic attending an opening night. "Because I'm **so** gonna watch." 


	20. Unintended Consequence of a Paradox Machine Shutdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Katarina / Martha.

Just over a year ago, when she'd been a medical student, Martha would confidently have diagnosed sleep paralysis. Now, she'd seen enough of the Universe to know that things weren't always that simple. 

Also, even if it was sleep paralysis, it didn't make it any less scary that she couldn't move and a ghostly woman was sitting on her. 

"Like you, I trusted the Doctor," the woman whispered. "You walked for a year. I walk the Universe, forever." 

She leaned closer, her dark hair waving in a wind Martha couldn't feel. 

Martha woke, shivering, and found her decision was made. 


	21. Customer Satisfaction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose / Liz.

"That's a lot of trouble you went to," Professor Liz Shaw said. "It wasn't a very valuable brooch." 

"Yeah, well." Rose pushed her hair back. "No effort spared. That's the Henrik's motto." 

"And very resourceful of you to track me down like that." She leaned closer, looking over her glasses at Rose. "What's an intelligent girl like you doing working in a shop?" 

"Long story." 

"Probably involving a man? I gave up on men a long time ago." She coughed. "I'd like to reward you properly. How about I buy you dinner?" 

"You sure it's just dinner?" 

Liz smiled. "Maybe." 


	22. Victoria's Values

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victoria / Six.

"Aren't I entitled to a kiss?" the Doctor asked. 

"But you're not my husband," Victoria said. "I've never kissed a man who isn't my husband, not in that way." 

"And you told me you never married." 

"I did." 

"Which means... obviously, you've been saving yourself for me! Very sensible, my dear. Why settle for second best when you can have the acme of perfection? Now, we were talking about kisses." 

Victoria sighed. "If I hear one more word out of you on the subject, I shall turn you out of this bed and you can sleep on the sofa again." 


End file.
